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Ordeals - are over when we can rejoice in them
You may accept an ordeal, understand it and agree that it is inevitable but at the same time feel bitterness, sadness and regret: you think it would have been so much better not to have had to go through it! If that is the case, you can tell yourself that your ordeal is not yet over. So when can we say an ordeal is over? When we are able to rejoice in it. Yes, rejoice in it! It may not appear to have helped much, and we might even appear to have lost something because of it, even beings who are dear to us. And yet, after the ordeal, one day we suddenly feel we have grown in light, love and strength, that there is a peace and joy within us that we did not know before. Then, and only then, can we say the ordeal is over.
Omraam Mikhael Aivanhov